Beware the lollipop of Mediocrity - Lick it once and You'll Suck Forever.

OK, so last week I told you about the hazards of the world's dumbest and ugliest animal, the Kangaroo. Today we will talk about the other great Australian nuisance - The Golden crested Cockatoo.

 

I am a shift worker and I tend to want to sleep during the day while I work at night. One of the difficulties of this, is that during the day things are noisy. There are trucks and cars and people talking loudly and all the other noises we hear all day. The one noise that really keeps me awake though is the horrid screeching of the bloody cockatoos. There are hundreds of the little lice-ridden buggers around here and they make a noise like a cat being strangled. 

 

In some countries, people pay outrageous amounts of cash for these disgusting birds and I fail to understand why. They are dirty, noisy and they destroy houses. Oh yes, they don't tell you that in the brochures do they? Cockatoos will pick at and destroy any wooden structure they can get their beaks into. This includes the eaves of your house and the branches of the very large gum tree that sits in your yard and whose branches reach out over your house.

 

The sound of falling gum tree branches is pretty scary when it's in your yard and over your head. The sight of your eaves after the birds have had at them is just infuriating. They literally pull the eaves to bits and leave the splinters all over the path.

 

I hate cockatoos, I hate them and I wish they would all die!