It is my sad duty at this time, to inform you of the death of one of my fish. "Big-Fish" as he (or she) was known, was caught by my son at Lake Burley Griffin some 7 years ago and brought home as a trophy. He (or she) was captured with four others and they all survived until now. Two other fish have been added to the mix and one of them died a year or so ago but of the originals only Big-Fish has passed. It is believed that he (or she) passed away sometime in the past 48 hours of natural causes. Police said no suspicious circumstances were found to indicate foul play and no post mortem was carried out.
Big-Fish was buried in a quiet ceremony at lunch time in the back yard, in the rain, to the accompaniment of bagpipes (in my head) He (or she) will be sadly missed. Big-Fish was like most carp, a huge weed fiend and the aquarium is expected to see an increase in weed much to the delight of bereaved friends.
And now on the Darwin Awards. "The Darwin Awards salute the improvement of the human genome by honouring those who remove themselves from it. Of necessity, this honor is generally bestowed posthumously."
Darwin Award: FREEWAY DANGLER
-- Confirmed by Darwin
(31 May 2005, Seattle, Washington) Strength and endurance are two of
the most important characteristics that can be passed on to improve
the species, so physical challenges between males are frequent. In
this case, two drinking buddies found themselves on an overpass 40
feet above a busy freeway in downtown Seattle at 2:45 a.m. It turned
out to be the perfect place to determine who had more strength and
endurance. Whoever could dangle from the overpass the longest would
win!
Unfortunately, the winner was too tired from his victory to climb back
up, despite help from his 31-year-old friend. The unidentified
champion fell smack into the front of a semi-truck barreling down the
highway at 60 mph and bounced onto the pavement, where he was hit by a
car. The car did not stop. Authorities did not identify the winner
of the competition.
Darwin Award: PLAYING WITH ELEPHANTS
-- Confirmed by Darwin
(7 March 2005, Hanoi, Vietnam) Nguyen, 21, had been drinking with
friends in the Tu Liem district, when he pulled out an old detonator
he had found. It was about six centimeters long and eight centimeters
in diameter, with two wires hanging out. Because it was old and
rusty, Nguyen said, it couldn't explode. His friends disagreed.
To prove his point, Nguyen put the detonator in his mouth and asked
his friend to plug the dangling wires into a 220-volt electrical
receptacle.
Turns out Nyugen was wrong!
The victim had little time to reflect on his mistaken, or whether 220
volts alone could have been fatal. According to police, "the
explosion blew out his cheeks and smashed all his teeth." He died on
the way to the hospital.
There are no boobies tonight in honour of Big-Fish.
darwin awards